Don't make friends with your food.

 

"I think I love you. Do you love me too?"

"That depends. Are you going to eat me?"

"What else should I do with you?"

"First of all, don't make friends with your food and then eat them. It's really confusing, gross and mean. Just put me down over there under the tree and let me live out my remaining days."

"The ants will eat you then."

"True. Sounds like a slow death. Go ahead, eat me."

"This conversation has gone on too long. I can't now. I think I will go inside and get a banana instead."

"Just promise me you won't give me to the little human. She'll take one bite and leave me to die."

"I'll give you to my dad. You'll be finished in one bite."

"Deal."

Leg Day

Today is leg day. Follow me for more leg strengthening exercises you can do at home.

Let's Write

"So, we are going to write for 15 minutes. You can write about whatever you want, but you must keep going. Do not put your pencil down. Write whatever comes to mind. It doesn't even need to be anything good."

"I thought when you invited me over we were going to do something fun."

"This is fun. Try it."

"I did....in my head and I didn't like it."

"Fine, go get us a snack and I'll write about what a pout you are."

"Sounds good to me!"

My favorite color is happy.

 

Summer rain

 This is my first summer rain.

And it tastes like the summer clouds. How delightful. 

No hands

I think this will work!

Look, I have got it!

Nope, not yet!

 OK kids, do not try this at home, at the beach, at the park or anywhere else. I am a partially trained pro. I will upload a "How to video" and a "How not video." Happy Saturday!

Good Morning

 

Let's Swim

"Can Mr. Duck join you?"

"Sure!"

 "Now make room for me!"

Winner takes all

Remember, there are no ropies! YEP!

 

You didn't say no feeties!

Next time remind me to say no feeties too.

 

You get his left

And I'll take his right

And just so you know

Ladies get the first bite.

 

Oh that is so sweet

You are so very nice

But how can I bite

When he has such sweet eyes?

 

He was born to be sweet

To be on this plate

Now hurry and dig in

Before it's too late.

 

His days are numbered

His aging has begun

And who wants to eat

A stale cinnamon bun?

What did I do today?

 

Yep, you stepped in it!

 "I hate to break it to you, but I think you did step in dog poo."

"I knew it. Gosh dogs are just complete animals."

"Well, you are a cat and cats are animals."

"Yes, but I use the restroom like a civilized animal."

"Is that even a thing?"

"Yes dear, it is."

The Ant

 

"Mom, there is an ant in my room! Hurry, come and see!"

"Just squish it!"

"Hi, um....."

"Do you happen to know when you are leaving?"